Sunday, April 21, 2013

A Few Opinions on the Thatchers, Shared with the Clangers


BOXMEN, Geeth: "Thatchers are overrated, they are. I've read all the books about tem, and look, I understand they're fighters and such, but it's not respectable, climbing around on people's houses and peeking in their windows." 

MASONS, Zebulon Tugg: "Couched as it is, this looks like an attack on an esteemed guild, but I know this is just your youthful vigor. I too see value in a commission of such kind. For the good of the guilds, of course, Thatchers included." 

BENEVOLENT ORDER: Adonis Fane quietly listens. Does not indicate whether or not he will support this move, but does indicate that if the guilds cannot defend their own, they are not worthy to maintain representation and rule. 

IDLEMAN'S GUILD: Idleman himself, "Look I know a little something about guilds, friend, and you're no guild. I don't know what your endgame is, but I know you're playing one. I'm not sticking my neck out on this one." 

RENOVATOR'S ASSOCIATION, Jophesus the Mighty: "This is right and proper. As a parliament, we should exert oversight. That is our very Good and Rightful mission." 

SPOUTING CLUB, the Waft: "It very much deserves rigorous debate before the house. The Thatchers are famous, of course, and beloved heroes of working men. All the better the challenge. We may not win it, and it is ok if we do not, but the debate will be worthwhile." 

SURLY CLUB, Fallow Lang: "Oh fuck off. What, you still haven't fucked off? Yes, alright, I suppose it'd ruffle some feathers. Already has. Want to join our club? No, we're not that interested in your damned legislation, but what the hell, go ahead with it." 

ALLIANCE FOR THE LEGITIMATION OF SHINE: "Well, they're a bit macho, climbing about in the rain, fighting on rooftops, and so on. Anyway, what did you say there? Sorry, got lost in thought. You want a hit of this? It's primo stuff."  

MONEYLENDERS, Cornelius Fink: "This is about guild power, and that's old power. Sometimes that's good, sometimes it isn't. I'll talk to my people, but I make no promises."

FERRYMEN, Edgar: "No sir. I know a lot of good men from the Thatchers. Sounds like a besmirchment of their good reputation." 

FLOOD STREET DESCENDANTS, Lord Boz of Hill Top: "Sounds like you want to rumble 'em. Good, I like it. I have no fight wiv 'em meself, them being known scrappers and that's respectable business it is. But you're scrappin' with a scrapper, and I can respect that." 

WORMERS: "Right. You kill a flying rock on a rooftop and you're a hero. Us, we're killing demons that're infesting your very home and hearth. Do we get any respect? No. Murderers. Can you believe that? What a suggestion. Worms are people. I say gargoyles are people then, how do you like that? So Thatchers is murderers too. That's what I say. To hell with 'em." 

TOOLMAKERS: "Friend, the Thatchers are one of the most respected public guilds in the city. Penny-books about their rooftop exploits are the favorite reading of the literate working man, and stories about their adventures are common pub tale-telling. Why Mr. John Bench himself is something of a folk hero, and that well-deserved. You are talking about good roof men, not bloody syphylitic Pumpers. There is no good in your legislation or your idea to besmirch the name of our honest working men, and I have no qualms to tell you that."